Single Working Womens Week – SWWAN

We single working women have to laugh or we’d go insane. Given the extreme hurry that our world is in these days, we have little choice but to keep the pace if we want to live in an area where there are enough affordable services that we can get what we need in order to perform all the duties and obligations of our lives.

Talking to a fellow SWWAN on the phone yesterday, when I told her about how we are negotiating discounts and special services for SWWANs, she said, you know how when you get the voice messages that say, Press 1 for Spanish, Press 2 for English…she says she keeps waiting for them to say, Press 3 for single moms!

Yep, that’s the kind of thinking we need from corporate America!

Many thanks to single-working-woman Chris King who writes a fantastic newsletter with productivity and creativity tips and resources. She tells us in today’s edition how to get some good learnin’ on your own time:

Free online classes in a plethora of topics, from digital photography, better PowerPoint presentations (heaven knows most of the ones we see could use some help) to oh-just-about-anything-you-can-imagine. HP’s are here. CNET’s are here.

Chris is a writer, storyteller, aerobic instructor (11 classes a week!) and facilitator. She’s all over the Internet and can give you great recommendations (her latest site for this is here). She’s a powerful, high-energy single working woman who gives her all to everyone who comes in contact with her (in person and online). To SUBSCRIBE to her “Random Tips and Productive Resources” along with “Portfolio Potpourri,” put “subscribe” in the subject line and e-mail here.

Thanks, Chris, for all you do.

Many single working women dream of one day being their own boss. Part of what we do at SWWAN is donate 1% of all our proceeds to the Grameen Foundation, which helps underprivileged people (surprise, mainly women!) from all over the world by giving them low-cost loans and training on how to start their own successful businesses. It’s truly an organization that empowers people, and we are very proud to be able to support their work.

Meanwhile, check out the Solo Entrepreneur blog over at our fellow women’s site WorldWIT (stands for Women. Insights. Technology.) Mary McDonald operates her own consulting business and writes about day-to-day challenges of being a solo woman business owner–surely the most gratifying–and potentially terrifying–way to earn your living in this world. She talks about the ups and downs, the cash flow fears, the feast-or-famine cycles, the challenges of cloning yourself.

Now add to that your single state, and you’re talking about women who have strength and courage in such abundance that they are an inspiration to all of us. Love to hear your tales of single-woman, solo entrepreneur adventures. Send ’em to us here.

What’s your favorite trick for feeling comfortable when you eat in a nice restaurant by yourself? Reading something–a book, newspaper, etc.–is a popular solution. The only thing wrong with that is, you may inadvertently be depriving yourself of the complete enjoyment of your food. I know I always tend to eat more and enjoy it less when I’m reading–can’t pay attention both to the content and to the food.

One way I’ve done it is to write in my journal. I can really be involved in the present experience when I write down what’s actually happening to me and around me. It seems to me that when you look around at others and the surroundings with a pen in your hand, it doesn’t appear to other people as a) nosy, b) lonely, c) threatening if they can clearly see that you’re thinking about what to write next! And it has the added bonus of giving people an excuse to talk to you if they want to–kind of like having a dog or a baby. Gives you a slight air of mystery and gives others a little icebreaker when they can ask you, oh, are you a writer?

And the answer, of course, is yes! Becaues you are a writer when you keep a journal. Doesn’t matter that you failed grammar and spelling in third grade. Who cares when it’s your personal writing? I highly recommend journal writing. It can be very surprising–never know what you might discover about yourself.

Got a copy of a wonderful magazine in the mail the other day. Have no idea where it came from–I didn’t subscribe as far as I know. It’s called BeE Woman, For the woman who is interested in politics, lifestyle and finance. It’s supposed to appeal to “active, hardworking, educated women between 25 and 54” (who pays attention to age restrictions?).

Listen to this article title: “Are you a little bit married?” Reflections on the fallout for so many couples who live together without formal marriage (surprise! it often turns out to be a bad deal).

This sounds like it was created just for a lot of us SWWANs. …”enlightened, empowered, engaged, inspired, and striving for financial independence.” Interesting, I see they got a lot of press coverage early on in 2005, but don’t see anything for this year.

Well, let us at SWWAN be the first to write about you, BeE, and tell you what a stellar publication you’re putting out. As we build our membership we will certainly be recommending your magazine to everyone! Check out their website here.

Can you imagine being put in jail (and worse) because you wanted the right to vote? If you’ve not read much women’s history, you probably have no idea what suffering the suffragists (women who fought for the right to vote for women) went through back in the early 20th century. On August 26 the U.S. celebrates Women’s Equality Day.

Got some cool facts from the YWCA email:

More women than men have voted in every election since 1964 (I wonder if the charm of John and Jackie Kennedy made politics seem more real and enticed women voters out in force?…)

Because women received the right to vote, they were able to voice their concern over and eventually gain:
* The right to own property
* Rights in child custody and divorce proceedings
* Reproductive rights
* The right to a discrimination-free workplace
* Title IX, ensuring equal educational opportunities for men and women
* The right to get a loan and receive credit without a male co-signer. (Women were not given this right until 1974 with the passage of the Equal Credit Opportunity Act.)

* In the list of countries with parliaments, the U.S. ranks 67th in terms of the number of women who are members of the parliament. Rwanda, Nicaragua and Ethiopia each have more women than the United States.

Whether you’re a single mom who struggles to pay for child care or a worker in this field, it’s hard to believe that our society still puts such a low value on caring for our children. Check out this website – the Center for the Childcare Workforce explains that the Bureau of Labor Statistics figures must be interpreted correctly.

Okay, the mean wage (which means average) for child care workers in the U.S. is $7.42–the average can be skewed by a few reports of higher wages. The median wage (half of salaries are above and half below) for U.S. child care workers is $6.91–closer to what most workers actually receive.

It’s nice to know that the American Federation of Teachers Educational Foundation has created this project as a watchdog for the early education of our nation’s kids. Here’s their mission statement:

CCW/AFTEF’s mission is to improve the quality of early care and education for all children by promoting policy, research and organizing that ensure the early care and education workforce is well-educated, receives better compensation and a voice in their workplace.

Sounds like a plan worth pursuing.

Are you “high maintenance”? I hope you’ve seen the movie, When Harry Met Sally–an absolute classic about single life. If you’ve only seen it once, try watching it again. I feel sure you’ll find even more to enjoy. The scene where they’re both in bed (their own) watching Casablanca and talking to each other on the phone and Billy Crystal explains what “high maintenance” means gives a brilliant little insight into dating and male perspective about women.

Do people tell you you’re too fussy? Hey, as a SWANN you’re welcome to be. Most of us have high standards–for lots of things in our lives–and we’re not the least bit embarrassed about it. As old Martha says, it’s a good thing.

Interesting discussion with another SWWAN this week. Asking if having someone live-in (friend, boyfriend, whatever) is substantially different from living alone. Some quiet reflections:

If you have a live-in, that’s someone who stays with you, whether you’re getting along or not. Someone who knows if you’re home or not, expects you at a certain time, and would think something might be wrong if you are late when your tire is flat and you’re stranded.

A live-in is someone who can SEE that you are sick—-you don’t have to call and tell them and then ask for help. It’s someone to help carry things, or who hears you scream if you slip in the shower and smack your elbow. And if that someone shares the expenses, that’s a huge thing, too.

Having a live-in makes a really big difference in how you experience life. Even if you have a perfect boyfriend who’s around a lot, it’s not the same as having someone live with you. You still have to make an effort and take some action to bring that person into your life at any particular moment.”

Beautifully said. As author Alice Walker so aptly puts it, when you have a live-in, that’s at least one side of you that’s covered. When you live alone, you’re vulnerable on all sides.

Another anecdote from a SWWAN about the dieting thing:

Torture! Ok, they put a Dunkin Donuts IN MY TRAIN STATION at home. I don’t even have to take three steps out of my way and there I am at the counter. I can smell the heavenly, fatty, greasy smell as soon as I start down the stairs. And then I have to go past it again on my way home! What is this, a conspiracy?!?!

What tortures does the universe put in your way? I discovered recently that when I watch TV at night, the urge to eat (usually bad stuff) is almost overwhelming. What’s up with that? Is the only solution to stop watching TV?