Single working women – our votes can influence history

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Hard to believe that only 90 years ago some of our Grandmothers and Great-grandmothers were in the streets fighting for a woman’s right to vote. And back in the early 1900s some women even got arrested, beaten and tortured in the fight.

But believe it: women—especially single working women who have voted in lower numbers in the past—could have a dramatic impact on election results by casting their ballots in force. Perhaps because women are so busy–and some of us might feel confused or hopeless about making a difference–women tend not to vote. Believe that your vote is critical. REGISTER to vote if you haven’t. You’ve got ’til October 6. Check out your Secretary of State’s website to see if you can register online You can also register in person at a public library, motor vehicle bureau or county board of elections.

Learn the truth about candidates

How do you know who to vote for? Some of us inform ourselves and vote strictly along party lines. But in order to truly make the most informed choice, what we really need to do is get a cross-section of opinions. Don’t just trust the ads and the party-line websites. Check out the following for information and commentary about where presidential candidates stand on issues.

www.realclearpolitics.com/
www.thepage.com/

P.S. I’ve just removed one of the sources I had originally listed because I did some reading after receiving a comment from a reader and realized that I had named a source that I don’t now believe to be truthful or clear. My apologies for not checking my sources more carefully.

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Barbara Payne, October 2nd 2008 | Posted in presidential candidates, women vote

Shopping bliss for living single

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We single working women are lucky today because we can save so much time and effort by shopping online–for groceries (Peapod in Chicago delivers the stuff right to your kitchen), shoes, clothing, practical homeowner stuff like furnace filters, or whatever. Imagine–the Chicago Public Library system JUST got their system online so you can renew books on the website instead of having to trundle off to the library each time. And if you’re like me, sometimes you end up having to renew books a couple of times because you thought you were going to have time to read but you were too tired too many nights and just wanted to veg in front of the television.

Think about the old days when we had to do everything around the house, work full time, and run around at the most crowded times (after work and on weekends) to get all the shopping and errands done, especially us single moms!

Now I’ve been married (was for 18 years) so I know that it’s pretty much the same for a lot of married women. Many husbands don’t help much with shopping or errands or even doing kid stuff. But the nice thing there is, for most married people, at least there’s the comfort of two incomes when you both work. Incidentally, I greatly admire those families that decide to forego the extras and live in less luxurious quarters because they want mom (or dad) home taking care of the kids.

And I don’t know about you, but I’m always willing to pay a little extra to save the time and aggravation of running around. I figure my time is precious. So then, add the fact that women in general receive about 70 cents for every dollar men receive to the fact that single women are making it on one income, and you’ve got a picture of the financial struggle many single women face. By the way, you can find some good deals on lots of different items (from many of your favorite stores like Home Depot, Target, etc.) at the SWWAN store. Shop here and help SWWAN get points!

We’re going to be focusing on building our network of trusted service providers in the coming years. If you know vendors who deliver reliable, trustworthy service–especially to women–please email us with the business name, type of services, contact info (and your name as the referrer if you like) so we can talk to them about joining the SWWAN-approved vendor network.

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Barbara Payne, September 24th 2008 | Posted in shop online, women's wages

Single working women and illness

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Ever been hospitalized or had occasion to be out of commission for a while? Some of the big corporations have short-term disability as a benefit (if you’re sick more than X days this insurance plan pays your salary). Other companies are just very nice to their employees and pay them even during an extended convalescence. But for those with less-generous employers and for the self-employed, a longer disability of even a month can pose a serious financial problem. Not to mention if you need assistance during your recovery.

Some women are lucky to have family members who can help. But the critical factor for most single women is having developed a network of friends and acquaintances who will rise to the occasion and be there for you. Found this section on friends and illness for single women in excerpts from another interesting book, “Flying Solo: Single Women in Midlife” by Carol M. Anderson, Susan Stewart, Sona Dimidjian.

Thus, the ability to find and make friends becomes an even more important skill for single women than for most other people. As SWWAN grows, we hope to become a place where single working women can proudly identify themselves, find each other more easily, and potentially get to know each other. We’re starting with our Ning social network–still building the infrastructure but will keep you informed. And as the social environment becomes more welcoming to singles, we’re also going to be offering opportunities for single women who want to learn to reach out more effectively.

Lots to do. We look forward to our journey!

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Barbara Payne, September 16th 2008 | Posted in flying solo, single women in midlife, single working women illness

Single women pioneering creative lifestyles

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That’s what Dr. Kay Trimberger observed in her ten-year study of single working women’s varied lifestyles. Single women today are pioneers–looking beyond traditional forms and breaking new ground to find ways to incorporate intimacy, connections with younger generations, friendship, sensuality, and so on into our lives.

She observed that the most satisfying single lives were supported by six pillars that the individual woman had mastered in some way:
a. Make a home – decorating, gardening, cooking
b. Work – meaningful, joyful but not workaholic
c. Network of friends and extended family – takes good social skills to achieve
d. Community – network(s) of connections through church, politics, work
e. Connection to next generation – relatives, friends, mentoring, other approaches
f. Sexuality – from creative celibacy, to widely varying arrangements with lovers, to other ways of incorporating sensuality

She was surprised to learn that the middle-class single women she studied came from the same types of typical middle class families as married women. They didn’t have significantly more or less dysfunction in their early lives–as many people would suggest as a reason why women remain single.

Perhaps her most fascinating observation was that the least happy single women she studied were those who put most of their energy into either finding or keeping a partner.

Dr. Trimberger urges all single women to claim what is good about their lives. That we should feel free to do what we want–not what society tells us to do. Listen to her thoughtful interview on the new pioneering single woman of today.

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Barbara Payne, August 17th 2008 | Posted in single lifestyles, single women pioneer, single working women

Chicago weekend

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Just got down from the top of the Sears Tower where we were treated to the sight of the Blue Angels’ hot-shot flying routines. This view is from Union Station. That white building is obscuring the view of the main part of the Tower–all you see in the photo is the very top stem of the black Sears Tower. It’s one of those rare perfect-weather weekends.

A friend visiting from Cleveland. Fun to enjoy the city with a visitor. I find that people talk to “us” when I’m with a male more than anyone does when I’m alone. Any other SWWANs notice that?

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Barbara Payne, August 16th 2008 | Posted in Sears Tower, talk to single woman

Polar bears in trouble – lessons for single working women

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Saw a TV special the other evening. ‘Face to face with the polar bear.’ Global warming is causing increasing difficulties for these magnificent bears. The story focused on watching a pair of cubs grow up into adults. It talked about how the ice is melting sooner, thus eliminating big sections of the frozen areas and cutting short the time for polar bears to hunt.

The male cub had learned how to hunt effectively and was able to feed himself. But unlike her brother, the female cub didn’t get very good at the required hunting skills. The early breakdown of the ice surfaces meant she had less time to get enough food to survive the long months when the bears don’t have easy access to seals, their main food.

When this beautiful female bear came out of the water, she looked like a walking skeleton with fur. It was so sad. It made me think about the hunting grounds of the human economy these days. Companies are dying; opportunities are fewer and harder to find; competition is intense. Effective hunting skills are essential for survival.

Founding members get to list their information on our website. You can list your consulting company, your qualifications, whatever you want to highlight about yourself. We are also considering starting a directory of single working women in business so that if you have a need for services, you’ll have the chance to do business with a fellow SWWAN.

Send us your business name and the services or products you offer. We’ll see what develops.

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Barbara Payne, August 10th 2008 | Posted in job opportunities, single working women in business

Solo lifestyle ideas

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Check this out! Sololady.com. It’s a lifestyle website for single women. Especially like the tips on traveling solo.

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Barbara Payne, August 10th 2008 | Posted in single women, solo travel

The SWWAN social network site!

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After a request from a UK member to connect with others in her region, we decided it was time to create our social network site. And it is here at SWWAN‘s site on ning.com. We’ll soon be inviting you and all our SWWAN members to communicate. Lots more work to do! But take a visit if you have a minute and send us your feedback.

Oh, and take a look at this site: SmartNow for women over 35, a category that fits some SWWANs.

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Barbara Payne, August 3rd 2008 | Posted in single working women social network, SWWAN social network, women over 35

Single Working Women's Week a reason to congratulate yourself

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Yep, we’re just finishing up the second annual celebration of the week designated just for single working women. If you didn’t do something nice for yourself this past week, why not extend the holiday–as many of us do by stretching our birthday celebrations out for weeks–and do something wonderful today? And if you have some single working women friends, call them up and remind them to be good to themselves today. Do something nice for each other!

SWWAN is proud to be a voice for the new single woman of the today. If you’re reading this, you’re probably one of those women. You use your strength and your passions to create a life you find rewarding. You may be an older woman taking care of an elderly parent while still holding down a full-time job. You may be a successful entrepreneur who still finds time to volunteer for a worthy cause. You may be an independent woman who struggles to make financial ends meet but doesn’t mind too much because she’s doing what she loves.

You may be a person with a wide circle of good friends, or someone who likes her own company best–some of us are both. You may have a child herself or may volunteer to help children. You may have a pet or not. You finds creative ways to get the touch and the sense of connection every human being needs.

We are excited about our next SWWAN Dive show. I’ll be interviewing Dr. Kay Trimberger, author of The New Single Woman. She’ll share insights gained while following the creative lives of the single women profiled in her book. I especially look forward to sharing what she says about how single women can support each other during illness and when growing older. Tune in to “The New Single Woman–Uncensored” on August 15 at 11:00 am Central. We’ll try to make time for questions so you can call in if you like.

To all our fellow Single Working Women, seize the day and enjoy!

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Barbara Payne, August 3rd 2008 | Posted in busy single working women, human touch, Single Working Women's Week

Research on cohabiting reaches questionable conclusion

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Because I write a bioscience blog, I read a lot of medical and scientific topics. And I’ve learned to watch carefully for qualifying statements, extra information, study-size, and other limitations that can make conclusions tenuous or shaky.

Just found this article that’s headed: “Marriage may protect against dementia.” It makes it sound like living without a partner increases your risk of eventual cognitive impairment. But when you read the whole thing carefully, this report on a meeting of the Alzheimer’s Association, notes that those who developed Alzheimer’s were far more likely to have a certain gene marker than those who didn’t. And that having lost a partner through death or divorce increased that risk by a factor of about 8. So “other factors besides cohabitation were at work.” Yeah, for sure.

All the participants were Finnish citizens. I don’t know what it’s like to live alone in Finland. But the implication that people who don’t cohabit also don’t have social networks and close communication with other human beings seems totally out of line with my observations of many of today’s single women–and with those of our next guest on the SWWAN Dive show, Dr. Kay Trimberger.

Dr. Kay, herself an ever-single adoptive mother, has done the research. And she reports that what appeared to be true 20 or 30 years ago about, for example, single mothers by choice is now proven to be totally inaccurate–now that studies have been set up by investigators who are not so biased about the subject.

As the quantum laws say, nothing happens that is independent of the effect of the observer. How much truer even of scientific studies, which rely on the observer to choose what will be observed and set the conditions for observing. You can see how this approach would tend to reinforce whatever the experimenter already believes–consciously or unconsciously.

Don’t let the studies get you down! Listen live to our interview with sociologist Dr. Kay Trimberger, “The New Single Woman–Uncensored” on Friday August 15 at 11am CT/9am PT.

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Barbara Payne, July 31st 2008 | Posted in African single women/mothers, Dr. Kay Trimberger, single mothers by choice
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