Night time occupation

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Just wrote a couple of new book reviews for our SWWAN book/movie review page (www.swwan.org/mind_food/read_reviews.htm). Seems like a good thing to do at night when your brain is fried from a long day. It's always nice to remember what you enjoyed about reading a particular book.

We're working on getting some automated functionality set up so YOU can enter your own book and movie reviews on our website. Anybody know a friend or colleague with programming skills who'd like to help out single working women? If you know of some possible folks, please chat with them and/or send us their names. We'll gladly give that person credit and a spotlight on our website

Tired? Draw the line

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Yes, tiredness is often a chronic state for single working women. We want to do so much! When you don’t have children or a spouse at home, you tend to reach out many evenings for your social life as well as for business/networking. Why do you think people tend to gain weight when they get married? It’s because they get so relaxed! My ex-husband had tried to gain weight all his life (he was pretty scrawny as a kid). Once we got married, he gained 20 lbs. in the first year without even trying! Imagine how much easier it is for us females to gain weight…

Anyway, if you’re tired a lot–and most of us are–here are a few tips.

1. Don’t watch TV in your bedroom. Just use it for sleeping.
2. Don’t drink too much alcohol–some say any at all is bad. It disrupts your sleep patterns and you’ll get less sleep and what you do get will be poorer quality.
3. Listen to your body. If you feel tired at the end of the work day and the choice is between going to that one more networking meeting tonight and skipping it in favor of a good movie, remember that all you can do is all you can do–and it is enough.
4. Keep a book handy that reminds you not to take things too seriously. Find one that fits your beliefs and your comfort zone.

I don’t hold that these will be right for everybody by any means, but here are a few I keep around to transform my attitude: A Course in Miracles (tough reading but fascinating perspectives on every page), Creative Visualization (inspiration for making things happen in your life without killing yourself), The Seat of the Soul (radical stuff in here but some beautiful ideas as well).

Glass ceiling? Well, duh

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Yes, here’s a report on women in hospitality and how they aren’t chosen for the top jobs. Guess what? It’s going on in every industry. Just read a long article in the Harvard Business Review by a guy who’s trying to say it’s not really a glass ceiling, but things at every step in women’s careers that keep them from being chosen for the very top jobs.

“Verbally intimidating others can undermine a woman’s influence, and assertive behavior can reduce her chances of getting a job or advancing her career.” The old idea that women are damned if they do and damned if they don’t. Gosh, we could have told him that and saved him from having to do all that research. But, then, he wouldn’t have believed us anyway because we’re just females…

The bad news is plenty:

  • Women’s leadership styles have been proven over and over to be more effective than those of typical males–but only lead to advancement when used by men.
  • Women are putting in more child care hours than previous generations ever did, despite the fact that many men are doing more than they used to.
  • Hiring authorities are actually prejudiced–plain and simple–against women.

And the worse news he also shares is that though everybody seems to think women are going to continue to make headway, he sees a boatload of reasons why they won’t. That in fact, women’s progress into leadership positions has stalled and even slid backward slightly and is permanently halted.

His suggestions:

  • Raise awareness of the psychological drivers for prejudice against women and try to dispel those perceptions.
  • Change the long-hours-and-hanging-out-in-bars-after-work-equals-great-performance norm.
  • Reduce the subjectivity of performance evaluations to minimize conscious and unconscious prejudices.
  • Recruit openly and fairly rather than from informal social networks–in most of which females are largely excluded.
  • Hire women in executive positions to eliminate the problems that come with tokenism.

Ever happen to you? You’re the lone woman on the Board of Directors and you make a suggestion that is completely ignored, only to find that two minutes later the same thing is proposed by a man and accepted. It has to me and lots of other women I know. Now imagine the difficulties faced by single working moms in regard to those long hours? It’s a no-win situation today. We’ve got a long way to go, and miles before we rest.